The 30 Questions Challenge: 1.Family or Friends?

Sun’s out, laptops out. It’s time to get writing again.

Recently, I’ve been incredibly low on inspiration on what to even write. But I came across a pretty interesting blog post and thought what better place than to start here. So I’m setting myself and whoever reads this post the 30 Questions Challenge to try and break out of this block. It could be done all in one or several posts. The time frame doesn’t matter. It’s just to get writing. So let’s go!

Question 1. If you dislike your family, are you obligated to spend time with them? Show up at family functions? Help them out in their time of need? Is a family even relevant anymore – especially when you have a close circle of friends?

We get to choose our friends but not family. Perhaps this makes our close circle of friends sometimes even more significant than our blood relatives. We’ve handpicked them to be part of our lives. They’ve earned our trust. But the problem is we can always make new friends. Find other people who share the same interests. Whereas our family doesn’t change.  For me, there’s something precious about family that runs deeper than just a shared gene pool. It’s our origin – an undeniable piece of our past that has shaped who we are. Although saying this, I don’t think there’s an obligation to spend time with our family if our relationship is completely irreconcilable and both parties are simply happier when the other is away. I mean, why turn up at a family function if your presence is simply not welcomed? However, if there’s a way of fixing the relationship I believe family would and should take priority over friends. While, in terms of helping them, I think if we have the ability to do so, there is a duty to support our family in their time of need. I may sound horribly naive but I think we should help people regardless of who they are if it makes us happy to do it. There’s not much point to helping someone if we do it begrudgingly.

help - hepburn

But again there’s a grey area. Sometimes our struggles are what helps us grow stronger. By helping someone, in a way we deny them the opportunity to mature. For instance, a butterfly must rely on its own strength to break out of their cocoon. Its first challenge prepares its wings to support them in life. And I think that’s the problem in helping others – Are we truly helping the needy or providing them a shortcut in the face of an obstacle that leaves them vulnerable in the future? And again relying on others to give them a helping hand? Perhaps we should only help when help is wanted because to do otherwise would do more harm than good.

help -Plato



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